8. February 2010 by Frank.

(This was supposed to post several days ago but I’ve been on a mini-vacation (a wonderfully refreshing mini-vacation) made possible by an insurance payout from my late father-in-law.)

My job is deteriorating at an alarming pace.  Some truly bizarre plans and programs are being instituted at higher levels which can’t possibly bode well for a peon like me.  My particular store is apparently on very shaky ground despite decent sales numbers overall.  It’s certain key stats, however, that aren’t good enough.  Yes, that’s right, it’s the annual store is going to close scare.

This is the seventh or eighth time in the last ten years that this hoary old chestnut has been reused.

As usual, I’ll believe it when I see it.  I spent 17 years trying to convince myself you have to believe it first then you get to see it.  That’s what faith is, the evidence of things unseen.  You have to believe god’s promise first, believe you have already received the answer before there is an answer.  Then it will come to pass because god’s promises never fail.  Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things unseen.  Got that?  Faith is substance and evidence of the invisible.  Word of faith bible teaching at its best.

If you refuse to believe something until you see the evidence of it, well, that’s not faith.  It’s just an observation.  But if you believe it just because god (or one of his minions) said so, then you have great faith.  If you believe without any evidence at all you can work miracles.  Just ask Jesus.

Except that it doesn’t work.

Even the people who teach this stuff know it doesn’t work.  Baptists and other mainstream denominations know it doesn’t work so they try to alter the meaning of the verses or add all sorts of conditions.  Pentecostal types tend to declare the verses in question are absolutely true but almost without exception the people are full of sin and prevent them from working.

God’s humble followers always have an excuse why god never does what he says he does.

The believer is always at fault or god has some mysterious purpose why they must suffer.  But there is always an excuse.  We always want the answer right now but it isn’t always god’s time, he operates on a different level at a different pace.  But rest assured that all the shit in your life is happening for a reason, a real good godly reason.

I tried to convince myself of that when I got sued, I tried to persuade myself when my wages were garnished, I knew god had a plan when he let my wife drive our new car into the side of a building, I tried real hard to believe all those times and more.  But guess what, I still can’t fathom any plan in any of those events even thirty years later.  None of them made me a better person or a better christian.  I didn’t learn any valuable life lesson.  I gained no understanding, I didn’t become wiser.  And my faith most certainly did not grow stronger.

So what divine purpose could there possibly have been?

Faith was my life despite all those failures, which shows how far gone I actually was back then.  My faith convinced me that I could beat my ridiculously high blood pressure without medication.  Surely god would honor my faith in his healing power instead of the chemicals of men.  I most certainly had more faith than a mustard seed.

God was busy elsewhere the morning the morning of my stroke.  My blood pressure was so far gone I should have been dead.  I had no symptoms, I felt absolutely normal, there was no warning.  I was full of faith, praising god.  I was completely convinced I was right.  But my heart couldn’t pump blood to this small part of my brain.  The  oxygen it carried couldn’t reach the brain cells that were dying by the millions.  And suddenly, I lost control of the right side of my body.  Some fundamental component of who I was died as the brain tissue died.

My old life was over.  There was a new man in his place.  This new man had no faith and didn’t care.  But that didn’t matter.  This new man was a better man than the old man.  He wasn’t deluded.

In August I will have been living with this for twelve years.  Twelve years of pain daily, continually.  Twelve years of being unable to concentrate long enough to read a book by an author I love.   Twelve years of not caring.  Twelve years of altered perceptions.  Twelve years of being unable to remember large chunks of my life.

But it’s also been twelve years of not trying to make all this crap fit into my belief structure.  That’s the big BIG difference.  In many ways life is much simpler than it used to be.  Back when I believed god was in control and he had a plan for my life, I had to work very hard to make all the random disasters that kept befalling me fit into that plan.  Which is very very difficult (if you think about it) because god never seems very willing to let you in on just what that plan actually is.  A wrecked car here, a financial disaster there, a horrible illness on the one hand, an untimely death on the other.  All of them have to fit some ill-defined plan that you’re only guessing about in the first place.  It’s a stress producer.

I always used to wonder why so many church people needed to be refreshed from daily life every Sunday.  How could they get so burdened down every week?  Why did they have to show up for mid-week service so they could get through to Friday?  At least for me what was happening was the exact opposite.  All the praise and worship and sermons and teaching were in reality just loading me down with more sin and guilt and more worry that secular life was going to corrupt me even more during the week.  So I rushed back to every service to get the strength I needed to cope with life.  But what I was really getting was reinforcement of what a wretched sinner I was and how desperately I had to cling to god.  And to church.

I’ll admit that “shit happens” isn’t always a very satisfying way to think but it is worlds above “I wonder what god’s plan (purpose) for this disaster was?”  It doesn’t require any great anguish or soul searching. No mental gymnastics required.  No trying to figure out a plan that doesn’t exist except in your own imagination.

Shit happens.  I’m screwed.  Let’s get on with it.

Simple.

I like it that way.

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25. January 2010 by Frank.

I went with my wife to church today because she was going to sing a special.  She did good.  The pastor, however, didn’t.

His main topic was prayer with faith being a secondary reinforcement.  Unfortunately for him his choice of verses quite clearly state that the prayer of faith WILL heal the sick.  This does not fit in with his beliefs or the doctrines of his church so he was forced to add conditions and alterations to the verse to make it mean something it did not say.  At the very least this is rather dishonest.

It’s also why it is no use trying to use logic and reason to refute these people; they are masters of making contrary statements fit their own preconceived notions by any means possible. 

Part of his elaboration was that in order for god to be god there had to be mystery involved.  Our minds are so petty that they can’t conceive the things of god.  His will is a mystery, his reasons for our suffering go beyond our ability to understand.  And since there is such mystery we can’t assume the prayer of faith will actually do what the bible says it will do.  Why?  Because we’re all sinners with tiny little pea brains.

Besides, it’s more about spiritual healing anyway.

What, may I ask, is spiritual healing?  Seriously, go in any church and try to get someone to actually explain what your spirit is in comprehensible terms.  I guarantee getting a straight answer is next to impossible.  Get them to tell you what’s the difference between spirit and soul.  If anyone has an answer it will be some variation of only the word of god can divide the two.  It is one of god’s mysteries.

Let’s just go with a basic definition; your spirit or soul is that part of your consciousness that makes you you.  Simple enough?

Now then let’s ask someone such as myself who has suffered brain damage what they think that means.  Any  small amount of research will show you that brain damage (injury, stroke, disease, drugs) can radically alter your personality.  It can change what makes you you in such a way that you can no longer even recognize yourself.  It can baffle other people so much that they will literally withdraw from you because they can’t comprehend how different you are.

If simple physical damage can change who you are and how you think how can there be some immaterial spirit being who is the real you?  How could I go from a fired up christian fanatic to a complete unbeliever without even trying?  I have a clearly defined dividing line between who I was before the stroke to who I am after.  There’s no grey area.  Faith was everything before and it’s nothing now.

Not that I just accepted that.  No, I studied relentlessly to find an explanation.  I studied different doctrines, church history, different philosophies; works I never would have looked at before.  I looked to science and medicine and found out about brain damage and what it could do.  I found actual, real, physical, natural explanations for what I was convinced was a spiritual problem.  And I learned to cope with it.

I found the truth and the truth set me free.

The truth wasn’t the bible.  It was cold, hard facts.

What I want to point out to people is simply this; if your faith and beliefs require you to add words or alter their meanings from your own sacred texts, then, obviously, your texts aren’t quite so sacred as you claim.  You know the verse doesn’t work but you can’t admit that.  So you throw in some mystery.  You add some variable that allows you to fail so that you can claim god’s word didn’t fail.

If the bible was really the word of a real god it wouldn’t need such dishonest help.

Would it?

Posted in wild guesses, interpretation, communication, listen, hearing, religion, emotion, stroke | Print | 3 Comments »

17. January 2010 by Frank.

Unless you live under a rock, you’ve seen or heard or read about Haiti this past week.  A monumental tragedy brought on by natural forces.  More than likely you’ve heard that paragon of virtue and christian compassion, Pat Robertson, blame the disaster not on nature but on a pact with the devil made back in the seventeen hundreds.  Which he assures us is a true story and even quotes the devil to prove it.  How anyone can take this douche bag seriously is beyond me.

But his lack of compassion should hardly be surprising; his god has shown no compassion whatsoever.  You see human beings giving their money, time, and physical efforts regardless of nationality or religion.  You see countries pouring out all sorts of humanitarian aid.  You even see some churches helping.  What you don’t see is any indication of is a merciful god doing anything to protect or help hundreds of thousands of people who lives have been destroyed.  You sure don’t see him helping to get all that aid to the people who actually need it.

That really isn’t the topic of this post, however.

A person I know is on a 3 state trip due to a family matter.  This person has quite a lot of followers on FaceBook.  He asked them to be praying for “traveling mercies” when he left.  Traveling mercies are sort of a pet peeve of mine.  Considering the appalling lack of godly mercy for the people of Haiti, I find the mere asking for such mercies rather appalling in itself.  The family of an impoverished widow is wiped out by a relentless force of nature and there is no mercy for her.  But the wonderful, loving, christian god will keep his needy followers safe on the freeway or help find their car keys when they’re in a hurry?  What is wrong with this picture?

This person isn’t unique.  I used to be the same way.  No matter what was going on in the world (and there’s always something horrifying going on) I thought my intimate little god was right there with me in the most mundane things of daily life.  It never occurred to me to question how he could help with my stomachache but ignore the guy down the street bleeding to death from a knife wound.  Selective mercy; what a concept.

Except, of course, that is what the bible says plain as day.  “I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on who I will have compassion.” That’s Romans 9:15 but read the whole thing.  That’s where god declares some are made for ignoble purposes and he puts up with them in order to display how great he is.  Like he did with Pharaoh and Moses.  Other verses claim he has mercy for all but it doesn’t take much to prove that isn’t true.

Everyone turns a blind eye to the suffering of others at some point in their life or another; you literally couldn’t cope with all the suffering in the world if you didn’t.  But god is supposed to be bigger than all of us, why is it he can’t seem to handle all of it either?  What bugs me is how his followers can so easily ignore reality as well.  These people are suffering horrors I can’t even imagine but please lord help me drive my car safely.  Except that the part about these people are suffering horrors I can’t even imagine does not even enter the equation.  It’s just I need travelling mercies.

No, I’m no great humanitarian myself.  There’s nothing I can do.  In the old days I would offer up a prayer or two or give some pitiful amount to a religious charity and claim I did my share.  I can still give some pitiful amount but there’s nothing to pray to anymore.  The results are the same.

The only help the people are going to get is going to come from other people.

Feel free to keep begging your pathetic little god to watch over you.  I am ashamed of myself for how much of that I did in my life.  These things I rant about seeing christians doing are all things I used to indulge in myself.

It’s disgusting.

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12. January 2010 by Frank.

End of the World Seminar cancelled.  No, not because of a lack of interest.  It was because my friend who invited me pulled a work related all-nighter.  So I’m slightly disappointed but I have found other end of the world scenarios to fill the gap.

Chief among them is this; Sarah Palin joins FOX NEWS as a political commentator.

That surely has to be a sign of the apocalypse.  Wasn’t it enough to have Brit Hume tell Tiger Woods to become a christian because christianity offers forgiveness and redemption much better than Buddha?  Wasn’t that enough wackiness from the home of Bill O’Reilly and Glen Beck?  Wasn’t their conservative bias far enough to the right already?

Apparently not.

On the other hand, wackiness exists in other forms as well.  A christian friend of mine who desperately needs my computer expertise cannot thank me enough for helping him but always has to throw in thanks to god for sending me his way.  I have always been an atheist since he has known me but he is convinced that it is god’s will that I am around to help him.  I find it amusing that god would go against my free will and arrange for me to help his “child” with his problems that no amount of praying will give him answers or abilities to handle himself.  Didn’t god have any christian computer geeks available?

Posted in humor, religion | Print | 2 Comments »

8. January 2010 by Frank.

This is the fifth post I’ve written in the last two weeks but it is only the first post I’ve posted out of all of them.  Why?  Because I didn’t like the direction they were going. 

That direction was “nowhere”.

Not that they weren’t interesting, mind you.  They were just too much a reflection of my curmudgeonly anti-holiday / anti-tradition rantings that I do every year at holiday time.  In other words, I was following my own tradition of griping about other people’s traditions.  And, somehow, that just seemed wrong.

I do expect to get an earful of new material next week when I attend an “end of the world” seminar with a friend.  I’ve never heard of the speaker at all but I do know he’s Seventh Day Adventist so I have a pretty good idea of the direction he’ll be heading.  Yes, I know, I’m a glutton for punishment, but sometimes this sort of thing can be amusing if not informative.

I was always a fan of end of the world science fiction and that didn’t change when I became a christian.  I just traded mankind, aliens, and natural disasters for god, the devil, and demons as the cause of worldwide destruction.  The christian variations on the theme weren’t nearly as entertaining as the science fiction stories but I gave them more weight because they were based on the bible.  And since the bible was the word of god they had to be true and accurate.

Yeah, right.

I read multiple dozens of such books back in the 1980’s.  They were full of all kind of dire warnings and predictions stated with much bravura and unquestioned certainty; after all, god’s prophecies never fail.  Well, that was 30 years ago and hardly any of those declarations came to pass.  In fact, the average science fiction story by some hack writer was far more accurate in its predictions than anything the christian hack writers ever came up with.

One such book I remember was “When Your Money Fails” by Mary Stewart Relfe.  Not that it was a good book worth remembering.  It was a book full of all sorts of actual photos of diabolical mark of the beast money fantasies.  Well, at least, they were actual photos until you got to the last page where the author admitted they were all fakes (in very very very small print) designed for illustration purposes.  What’s remarkable is that there’s a website for this right here.  I only looked at the first page but can anyone say conspiracy theory?

Be very afraid of those embedded microchips.

Something far more plausible and disturbing is the retina scanners that deliver up tailored to the individual advertising in the movie MINORITY REPORT.  One of my blogs back in the day allowed for advertising so I put Google’s Ad Sense on it (this was when they first started promoting it).  It scared me to death when it started displaying ads that were about the exact same subjects as my current posts.  It didn’t take long to understand the technology behind it but it was quite eerie at first because I had never seen anything that uncanny.  Tailored advertising is here; tailored to the individual isn’t that far off.

Be afraid of that.  Especially if advertising works well on you.

Conspiracy theories seem to abound these days but they are really nothing new.  It’s when they are tied in with religion and right wing politics that they become really scary.  Because, unfortunately, otherwise ordinary people eat this stuff up.  The last time I went to one of these seminars there were over a thousand people there.  The one next week is in a much bigger building.  Even though I can’t remember the guy’s name I fully expect the place to be packed.

Don’t worry about me.  I am already practicing my eye rolling and covering my laughter with sneezing fits.  Not sure what to do if snoring occurs.

Posted in communication, technology, humor, interpretation, listen, education, hearing, signs, religion | Print | 3 Comments »

22. December 2009 by Frank.

With an 83% rating on RottenTomatoes, AVATAR, James Cameron’s latest masterpiece can best be described as awe-inspiring.  In 3D.  I don’t know if it has the same impact in 2D (apparently it does, a friend tells me he thinks it is the best movie ever made and he only saw the 2D version).  I wish it was convenient for me to go see it on an Imax screen in 3D, I would probably be trying to think of more superlative words than mere awe-inspiring.

I’ve seen 5 or 6 digital 3D movies and while the technology is impressive (very mild headaches instead of bleeding eyes) the movies themselves really gained nothing by the third dimension.  Cool but hardly worth the extra expense.

AVATAR is completely different.  It is what you would expect 3D to be, real depth and actual physicality.  The movie takes place on the planet Pandora which is the most real, super detailed, living, breathing sci-fi/fantasy world ever created.  I never once felt like I was not in a real place.  Pandora is real, fantastic, and totally alien.  The overwhelming size of everything, from the towering heights of the Hometree to the seemingly miles deep vistas of canyons, waterfalls, and floating sky islands, staggers the imagination.  The incredibly vibrant colors of the various flora and fauna are beautiful to behold.  I saw one review mentioning that he/she thought Cameron had invented some new colors, I think that’s probably true, I’ve never seen anything that looks so breathtakingly gorgeous.  Did I mention how real it was?

I never once thought I was looking at computer animation, I was completely immersed in the planet Pandora.  Nothing seemed to be just a gimmick like every other 3D movie ever made.  There weren’t any sharp pointed objects leaping out at you just to startle you.  The film uses 3D like it was natural, it’s just how you see things.  It created incredible heights and amazing depths, none of which seemed forced or faked in any way.

The story is very simple.  There isn’t anything wrong with that like some critics imply.  It’s simple and powerful.  I don’t think a complicated or convoluted plot would have been appropriate with the sensory overload the lush gorgeousness of the planet produced.  Consider the basics of any epic fantasy and it’s all there.

It works because the Na’vi are real characters.  They are real people with intense expressions and emotions which are beautifully portrayed by their facial expressions.  One of the big complaints with computer animation is the eyes, until now no one has gotten them quite right.  You’ll never even notice in this movie which means they look entirely natural.  I never felt I was watching special effects moving around.

I bought everything that was happening as if it were all real.  Filmed on location with some great native actors.

I’ll have to see the movie several times before I get all the words and the names figured out.  I definitely want one of those flying dragons for my very own even though it would try to kill me to let me know it chose me.  Again, I never thought of them as special effects.  The Na’vi’s relationship with the animals was very intense and personal.  Once bonded, no one else could ride it.  They were equally bound to the forest and all the other life that abounded there.  Very native American in many ways.

To say that the final battle is spectacular is a vast understatement.  You will not be cheering for the humans and their advanced spaceships and weaponry.  Their motive is simple greed and that greed justifies what amounts to genocide.  It’s disgusting, watch their faces when they get their marching orders and then watch closely when they realize what they have done.  Truly epic.

Best movie ever made?

Yes.

Posted in humor, technology, listen, hearing, emotion | Print | 3 Comments »

18. December 2009 by Frank.

Even the completely Christian christian in our little group of retail employees agreed that Oral Roberts was a conman.  There’s no arguing that particular point, it is an unbiased fact.  This guy could not leave it at that, however.  He felt it was necessary to point out that Roberts was responsible for getting the word of god out to millions of people.  God still used him in spite of his greed and excesses.

I almost started to argue that it was pathetic to think god wanted his word spread by false teachers.

Then I remembered this passage from the bible:  “It is true that some preach Christ out of envy and rivalry, but others out of goodwill.  The latter do so in love, knowing that I am put here for the defense of the gospel.  The former preach Christ out of selfish ambition, not sincerely, supposing that they can stir up trouble for me while I am in chains.  But what does it matter?  The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached.  And because of this I rejoice.”  (Philippians 1:  15 – 18)  That’s the apostle Paul while he was in prison.  (Emphasis mine)

As long as Christ is preached it doesn’t matter what the preacher’s motives are.  The ends justify the means.  It is the word of god.  So my fellow employee was correct in his assessment of Roberts, he was a conman but he spread the word to millions so what does it matter.

I still think that’s pathetic but there I go again thinking I’m more moral than god.

I don’t suppose it would do any good to point out that the gospel Roberts preached was the “healing and prosperity” gospel which is not the same thing as the “salvation” gospel (entire denominations won’t have anything to do with each other over those differences.)  I don’t suppose that pointing out the bible also says not to have anything to do with false teachers or anyone who brings some other gospel.  If you let them in your house you share in their evil work.  Seems like a blatantly huge contradiction to me.

I would have thought god had higher standards than that.

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15. December 2009 by Frank.

Pain hurts.

Toothache pain hurts more than some other pains.

Nerves running through your sinus cavities and directly into your brain from your teeth hurt more than other nerves.

In other words, ouch!

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Christmas music has rotted my brain already after only a couple of weeks.  One two hour shopping trip with my wife has driven me to the edge of Bah Humbug permanently.  I know that I should get out of retail if I can’t stand all the crap that goes with retail this time of year but I am stuck for the time being.  Why anyone thinks Christmas is a christian holiday is beyond me.

Christmas is an artificial marketing phenomenon designed to move as much unnecessary product as possible while liberating vast amounts of money no one can afford to actually spend.  It is a day of greed without equal.  Churches can whine about commercialism all they want but the truth is that the holiday has been usurped from them just like they usurped it from the pagans.

I have some old Charlie Brown paperbacks from back in the day.  In one of them I was looking at there was a routine with Charlie Brown upset about trying to buy a Halloween mask.  He was upset because they didn’t have any.  They didn’t have any because they were already putting up Christmas decorations.  This book was dated 1959/1960.

Think about that.  The same thing people whine about now was common fifty years ago! 

The Christmas season has been starting right after Halloween for at least the last fifty years and yet it is rehashed like it is a new phenomenon every one of those years.  It is probably a safe bet to assume it goes back even further.  Talk about keeping your traditions alive.

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I have encountered a few people who use the phrase, “Merry Christmas,” as if it were some kind of attack.  I think these folks buy into the whole fake “War! On! Christmas!” bullshit that Fox News likes to promote.  They get mad at me because I don’t offer any holiday greeting at all.  I personally don’t care and my store doesn’t require it, we’re supposed to thank people for their business and be friendly but that’s it.  I’m friendly enough but I don’t feel any need to give any kind of holiday greeting just like I don’t feel the need to say bless you when someone sneezes.  You do know the superstitious nonsense that’s based on, don’t you?  I just don’t see the need.  (Although I will return a holiday greeting to people just being nice about it.)

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It hasn’t been much of a season for big blockbuster movies.  2012 was ok but I have no desire to see it again.  I refuse to bother with teenage vampire romances even though I really like vampire movies.  I have high hopes for AVATAR because James Cameron does have an impressive history of great sci-fi.  SHERLOCK HOLMES has Robert Downey Jr. so that’s two major points in it’s favor but it also has Guy Ritchie directing which is a potential downer.  We shall see.

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Right wing religion in the news has been on the lame side recently.  Getting Rick Warren to speak out against anti-gay laws in Uganda is hardly of interest.  Why would anyone believe anything the lying bastard says?  And Uganda is hardly a bastion of human rights to begin with.  If you want to see where prejudice lives just look at organized religion.  Really how is this news?

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There haven’t been any really good church signs to mock lately so I’ll have to use a lame one.  “A man wrapped up in himself makes a small package.”  Sort of Christmassy.  All of you secularists are self centered, small minded people.  If you focus on Jesus, you’ll be a big package.  Less of me and more of thee. 

Except that doesn’t really work.  If it did why would the church feel the constant need to teach its people to be humble?  Why would there be so much focus on what is called brokenness?  Pride is a bad thing, it has to be beaten out of you.  The only ego to be fed is the big guy.

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It’s no secret I don’t get much in the way of comments here despite having pretty good traffic.  Lately, I’ve noticed that if I comment on someone else’s blog the thread immediately dies or my comment is completely ignored amongst all the others.  I have several examples of both.  Apparently I am death to conversation.  Even after much introspection and wringing of hands, I still don’t know why.

It’s really strange because I’m such a nice guy.

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The baler was full at work yesterday so I had to make a bale.  All 4 wires broke when the bale hit the pallet.  There’s no way on earth to tip that back into the machine and even if there was you could never get the door to close again.  So I had to move it all by hand.  It was 30 degrees back there so I had on my sweater but I was sweating profusely.  And the Christmas music was blaring on its 4th or 5th go around.  So I spent 4 hours in frozen hell cleaning up the disaster.  You better believe I’m in the xmas spirit.  Ho Ho Ho, indeed.

Posted in wild guesses, humor, signs, hearing, religion, emotion, Uncategorized | Print | 1 Comment »

6. December 2009 by Frank.

8 hours a day all week long.

Nothing but christmas music.  Songs from back in the 40’s, 50’s, and 60’s.  Repeated 3 or 4 times a day.  The company I work for is trying to turn my brain into a giant mushy pile of goo and make my ears bleed.

All the while trying to freeze me to death in the backroom since there’s been no heat back there for over a month now.

Not that they aren’t trying to fix it, every time the guy comes in, he manages to short something else out.  He then orders more parts which won’t be in for yet another week.  Rinse and repeat.

Naturally, my car breaks down to the tune of nearly $700, thus insuring that no one gets nuthin’ for christmas again this year.

And, yes, Virginia, my wife threatened me with burning in hell for eternity if I don’t stop swearing and start going to church.

This has been a really fun week.

We also got our first ice storm of the season.  I love sliding through intersections and slipping down roads flanked by 5 to 8 foot deep trenches with no guard rails.  Next week, they are already warning about a massive Winter storm expected to hit Tuesday or Wednesday.  Joy.

My wife is planning on joining the new church she’s been going to so she had a copy of the church constitution in the car.  I, of course, decided to read it on my lunch break one day.  I only got part way through it but there was so much wrong with it that I never would have agreed to it even when I was superchristian.  Right off the bat, one of the main tenants was that you have to support and uphold the constitution.  It’s a nondenominational church but it is very anti-pentecostal.  The first thing I would have had a huge problem with was the declaration that there are no “supernatural” spiritual gifts in effect anymore such as speaking in tongues or prophecy or healing (except under special circumstances as god sees fit).  Only “natural” spiritual gifts such as teaching, preaching, and helping are for the church today.  Notice the contradiction of terms.

This church is also of the once saved always saved variety.  You can check out anytime you like but you can never really leave.

They also declare that the bible is the inerrant, literal, actual words of god in the “originals” which is far more common than you might realize.  The major problem with that is simply that there are no originals.  No one has ever seen the originals, just copies of copies of copies of copies.  How does anyone know what’s in them?

Naturally, they cite plenty of scripture to support these doctrines.  I can easily refute every one of them with other scripture which completely contradicts the ones they use. 

The one killer doctrine they hold is the universal depravity of mankind.  You’re conceived in sin, born in sin, live in sin, you have sin flowing in your veins.  I find that vastly amusing.  All those precious little christian bundles of joy are really hideous agents of satan just waiting to bust out.  No one actually believes their baby is full of sin so they have all sorts of implied doctrines to excuse that oversight.  Everyone must have Jesus as savior, even the little children but there’s special consideration for those too young to have any ability to understand.  Universal depravity is a thorn in christian sides.

Something else rather amusing is that they carefully associate themselves with a group that represents nondenominational churches but leave themselves a detailed “out” in case that group decides to do something they don’t like.  As I read that section, I couldn’t help but wonder why god would lead that group in a different direction than the church.  Why would he allow there to be disagreement about his will?  Shouldn’t all churches be going the same way?

None of this is new.  It was going on back in the day.  It’s a pity there’s been no improvement in the last 3 decades but I shouldn’t be surprised.  There’s been no improvement in the last 2000 years.  It’s as odd as the whole prenup agreements nowadays.  You start with the assumption of failure.  That’s no way to succeed.

The bible says god never changes.  Then it turns right around and says that he does.  I guess his followers have to be ready for that.

I couldn’t see how absurd all of this could be back in my fundie days.  Now, it’s so patently obvious. 

It seems as if the month of December shines a spotlight on all these things.  It’s supposed to give you the warm fuzzies but all it does is make my head hurt.

My score?  Season 1:  Me 0

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28. November 2009 by Frank.

In only one year and seven months this humble little blog just went over the 200,000 mark.  That makes me feel good.  Thank you very much to all who visit here.

Now if I can just figure out how to get some more of you to speak up and leave comments.

Then I would know for sure if some of those 200,000 were actual people.

Thanks, everybody, I really appreciate you.

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