THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS

21. November 2009 by Frank.

Many years ago Lester Sumrall was speaking about a big time evangelist in Africa (sorry, I can’t remember which one) who proudly told him that the first thing they taught newly founded churches was how to raise money.  Sumrall thought that was a fantastic idea.

That’s not too shocking, Sumrall was all about raising money.

Get them saved and teach them how to give to the church right away so you can get even more saved and teach them how to give to the church right away.  I’m not just referring to tithing, no, tithing was a requirement.  You weren’t actually giving until you gave money above and beyond your tithe.  If you didn’t tithe, god didn’t accept any of your other offerings, although the church gladly took it anyway.

Sumrall even stated that he thought it was also a good idea to send the deacons out to people’s houses to collect their tithes, offerings, and pledges just in case they didn’t come to church or “forgot” to pay up.  Money was more important than anything else in that ministry.

I joined up for the prayer line ministry.  I was shocked to discover that not only was I to pray for the callers, I was required to solicit them for money.  I was supposed to imply that god would be more inclined to answer their prayers if they financially supported the ministry.  I was also expected to man the telephones during their telethons, making calls to previous donors asking for more.  Some of these people on the list had given as little as ten cents.  I was then asked to continue making such calls weeks after the telethon was over.  Imagine my surprise one Saturday afternoon I was in the call center at the TV station alone when a couple I had seen in church came in and started calling people on the list.  It turned out they weren’t there as volunteers, they had been hired and were being paid to make the same calls I was making.

This whole ugly business very nearly destroyed my faith at the time.  Looking back, I wish it would have, I could have saved a few more useless years as christian.

But I was of the mind that one rotten apple didn’t mean the whole bushel was corrupt.

There is a perception that most televangelists are nothing more than big time con artists except among their followers.  This seems completely obvious to anyone not under their sway.  Having been up close and personal with several of them I know it as a fact.  Take a good con man and add in the ability to use religious guilt, you’ve got a multimillionaire televangelist.

I went to a Kenneth Copeland convention once even though I couldn’t afford the trip.  His teachings had me convinced I could do it by faith because I was sure god wanted me to attend.  I had to go to a worldly quick loan company to get enough money to pay for my hotel and to get back home, god didn’t help me at all.  Copeland, worth millions, was in the same restaurant as I and a number of other convention-goers.  Was he generous and treated all of us to a nice dinner?  No.  His fawning fans insisted on buying him and his wife the most expensive meals on the menu and pay their tip.  He was a great spiritual leader and god was just blessing him for doing god’s work.  I could have that, too, if I would just totally give myself to god as well.  But somehow or other, it never worked for me no matter how much I gave myself over to praying and studying the word.  I didn’t know how to raise money from the easily deceived.

But without exception these people know how to raise money.

I’ve never been financially sound, I’ve been struggling my entire adult life.  A large part of that is because I was trying to tithe and give offerings when I didn’t actually have enough money to do it.  These people convinced me that god had to have his share first (meaning the preacher and his church) before I paid my bills.  God’s 10% had to come off the top.  Unless you did that nothing else you gave mattered.  I made some horrendous financial decisions because of that teaching.

How the vow of poverty from days long past morphed into the prosperity gospel I have no idea.  But it did and now there are some branches of christianity that revolve around money far more than the son of god.  Sumrall taught that god wouldn’t heal you or bless you in any other way if you didn’t pay up.  Somehow if you deny me before men, I’ll deny you before the father got reworded to if you withhold your money from me, I’ll withhold the father’s blessings from you.  Anyone who sat under that ministry and got free of it knows that is the truth.

I frequently try to excuse less greedy churches.  Unfortunately, they still operate in the same realm.  Why is giving money a part of every worship service?   Why does it need to be done publically?  Jesus said not to let your left hand know what the right hand is doing.  What purpose does passing the offering plate serve other than to show other people your piety?  Seriously, why can’t church finances be done behind the scenes completely?

Because not very many would put any money in if they weren’t constrained to by some well applied public guilt.

You can’t serve god and mammon.

Apparently that isn’t true.

Money can’t buy happiness.  But it can buy off god.  Somehow that just doesn’t sound right.  Somehow that sounds like something human hucksters would do.  Hucksters in priest’s clothing.

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